Tuesday, September 9, 2014

To Write or Not to Write.....



For the last several months I've been working on a book, To Love Honor and Obey. I decided that I was going to write a book and submit it for publishing. Now I've decided  maybe that isn't such a good idea... I participated in one Saturday Spankings Hop. Overall I actually got good feedback. Even some helpful feedback such as not using Jordan and Lilly as the names of the characters (even though the book is based on "our" story) it is not entirely accurate and using our names complicates things. So now the names are Hilton and Savannah. I've grown to like them :) The problem is.. I am no English major. I'm having some issues with "Tense" and dialogue. I'm also feeling so inferior after visiting so many authors and really paying attention to the way they write and not necessarily the story itself. So, I've kinda put the book on the back burner.

Today I was writing a post for the blog about a recent trip off the right track that I had and it quickly turned into a story. Over three pages in fact. So my question for you guys is.... To Write or Not to Write?

I'm going to post the story I wrote today. It is about Jordan and I. I wrote it from his point of view. If you have the time...  read it. Offer constructive criticism if you have some. But most of all let me know if this kind of thing is something you would like to read. Because, this is how I write. Thanks to all of you in advance:) Warning it does contain explicit sexual content. If that offends you please stop reading now.


Lilly De-rails

Somehow things had gotten off track. Lilly’s submissiveness and respect were sorely lacking.  I wasn’t sure exactly what had happened to cause her derailing but I knew that I had to get Lilly back on board.

I knew she was a little stressed, back to school week was always hard for her. She hated to let the kids go. I was sure not feeling well for a couple of days didn’t help the situation either but regardless, there was no excuse for Lilly’s sass and disrespectfulness.

I tried to be the nice guy and give warnings. First the stern look. Then the comment “Twister?” followed by “Your on thin ice Lillyanna Rose…”  and even a pulled pony tail with a few firm swats to her clothed bottom in the kitchen after a particularly sarcastic remark. Nothing had worked. I knew what I needed to do but I really didn’t want to do it.

Lilly’s last punishment spanking had resulted in a purple bruised sore bottom. It hadn’t been my intention to mark her that way but when she refused to submit she earned double the strikes I had planned. Twenty strikes with the twister was an obscene number. It had started out at ten. It was a similar situation to this actually. Lilly had simply gotten off track.  A firm spanking always did the trick so I decided 10 whacks were sufficient to rectify the situation. But when the time to spank came… Lilly refused to get into position, earning herself five additional strikes. The threat of the additional strikes still didn’t convince her to move so again I warned her if I had to physically put her in position I would add an additional  5 strikes. Lilly didn’t budge so I physically positioned her and she resisted the entire time. True to my word I brought the wand down twenty times, making her count each one, from mid bottom to the top of her thighs. We got through it but it was not something I ever wanted to have to repeat. Actually since I saw the bruising I had been reluctant to spank again. I had let things slide for far too long now though and Lilly was quickly  slipping out of my control.

I knew Lilly should have learned her lesson the last time and this time when I scolded her and ordered her to get into position she should quickly comply to avoid additional strikes. But… I know Lilly… I would tell her to bend over the side of the bed and she would stand there and look at me pleading with her big blue eyes for me not to follow through and punish her. She would stand there until the stakes were raised so high she had to move and the spanking would become much more intense than I intended it to be.

I thought about it all day. I wanted to do something different this time. I didn’t want to give her the chance to disobey me and I came up with a plan.

That night, like every night, Lilly put the kids to bed and then met me in the bedroom. She found me sitting on the edge of the bed which is not unusual. I opened my knees and held out my arms to her indicating I wanted her to come to the edge of the bed and stand between my knees for a hug. We did this often. I would hold Lilly tight and she would rub my neck and back. It was a safe move for her so I knew she would comply.

As usual I hugged Lilly and she began rubbing. I started talking to her about her attitude. “Lilly, I don’t know what has gotten into you. You are not the boss around here! I am and I will not tolerate your disrespect…” She stiffened a bit but continued massaging and I let my hands fall to her bottom and caressed gently as I lectured. “I don’t want to have to punish you but you aren’t giving me a choice,” I continued. “I’ve given you several warnings over the past few days and you have ignored them,” I said tightening my legs so she was trapped between my knees exactly where I wanted her. Now she did not have the chance to disobey. “Now you’re going to get your bare bottom spanked.” I lowered her pajama pants and panties as I spoke and turned her to the side. “Please don’t do this Jordan. I promise I will be good!” she begged as I guided her over my knee.

 Her upper body rested on the bed and I positioned her bottom high on my lap. I gently rubbed her cheeks helping her to unclench them and relax. “Be a good girl Lilly, you know you need this,” I whispered. As her cheeks softened I eased her thighs open a bit to improve my view of her pussy. My hand wandered lower between her legs and as expected her lips were wet. I rubbed the full length of her slit and she moaned. 

I began spanking with my hand steadily increasing the strength of each strike. As I spanked harder Lilly began to squirm and try to protect her bottom. I landed some harsh swats to her thighs trying to cure the problem. “This is just your warm up Lillyanna Rose. You lay there and take your spanking like a big girl and you will be rewarded continue resisting and you will be punished more,” I instructed.

Being the stubborn brat Lilly can be she continued fighting. Little did she know I had stashed some things right beside me under my pillow.

“You were warned!” I said and I poured some lube down her crack. “No Jordan! Please don’t. Not that!!!,” she cried clenching her cheeks tight. Yes this I said rubbing my finger down her lubed slit. “If you continue resisting I will use this,” I said showing her the new large plug that I recently purchased. Lilly gasped and her cheeks relaxed allowing me to gently probe her puckered hole. Sufficiently relaxed I teased her pussy with our small plug fucking her in and out before moving the plug to her bottom and inserting it.

I continued hand spanking her now plugged ass and Lilly remained still. No squirming or guarding. My large plug threat was effective. Sufficiently warmed up I retrieved the leather paddle and conducted the punishment part of the spanking. When Lilly bottom was evenly reddened, I gave each of her sit spots a rapid 10 whacks. I wanted her to feel the spanking when she sat down for the next several days. Having a sore bottom kept her respectful and submissive which is exactly what I wanted.

Lilly had tolerated the remainder of the spanking very well. She had attempted very little movement and her attempt at guarding her bottom form the paddle had resulted in having her bottom fucked by the plug. No further guarding occurred after that.

The spanking was over and I caressed Lilly hot cheeks and dipped down to her pussy. She was dripping wet and my finger slipped gently inside. Sex wasn’t usually a part of our punishments but hey, rules are made to be broken. After all Lilly had been a pretty good girl and taken her spanking well so she deserved a reward.

I stood her up. “Bend over the pillows,” I commanded. Lilly eagerly complied. There she was bottom thrust up, legs spread, pink plug peeking out from between her bright red spanked cheeks and a glistening wet swollen pussy. I had to fuck her.


  1. To Write or Not to Write...Always choose WRITE. Never give up and take that plunge!

    1. Thanks for taking the time to visit Alta:) Nothing to lose except time I guess..

  2. Write, write, write! just keep experimenting, trying out things, play around with words, scenes, perspectives... and enjoy it. Your writing will evolve, all writers do and most will tell you where they start from isn't where they end up.

    "I would tell her to bend over the side of the bed and she would stand there and look at me pleading with her big blue eyes for me not to follow through and punish her. She would stand there until the stakes were raised so high she had to move and the spanking would become much more intense than I intended it to be."

    That's a lovely insight into Jordan.

    Keep at it!

    1. Thanks DF! As you well know it can be rewarding at times and discouraging at others. I guess there is nothing to lose except time:)

  3. You have the stories you want to tell, so tell them! The rest is mechanics. I like your writing, your voice comes out. Is anyone perfect at anything when they are just starting it? No! I think the best advice I can give you is, sure you want some helpful critiquing, but everyone has an opinion and if you start trying to listen to everybody you are going to make yourself crazy!
    Write, get the stories out, then have some people you like and who you feel will be honest with you beta read for you, and then take their advice or don't (sometimes I do, sometimes I don't).
    But if you like doing it, do it! There will always be judgers and there always be people who have an opinion, but you aren't writing for them, write for you and readers will appreciate that.

  4. Thanks a lot Casey:) Someone else mentioned beta readers. It was something I never heard of before. Is it something you do with your books? I would like to learn more about it.

  5. Lillyanna, I agree with Casey. I like your voice, too, and asking for helpful criticism is great, but in order not to drive yourself crazy you need to restrict your requests for feedback to people you trust. These individuals can be fellow writers, or readers, who you feel will give you honest feedback and not just platitudes. That's what beta readers are. They go through your work and offer suggestions how you can improve it (in their mind). That doesn't mean you have to accept the advice, but if you trust them and they explain their reasons well, you might want to consider it. You should never give up writing if it's something you enjoy. Practice makes perfect, or at least "better," so keep it up. We're all rooting for you.

    1. Thanks Kathryn. Feels like I'm pretty much starting from scratch after being 25, 000 words deep lol. I'm ready to move on and write something else! But this book is the beginning of the story. I will continue plugging through.

  6. Hey I like your writing well enough...and agree Keep on writing!! There is a big audience for it!! I would like to see you write from first person too though...I think as writers we write best what we know internally, if that makes sense.

    1. Thanks for reading. I often write in first person too. This story just came out this way:)

  7. Lillyanna.

    Your story flows nicely and has a cleverness about it that I liked. I enjoyed reading so I vote to write! I also agree with the others that getting comments from a few trusted friends is the best way to get valuable feedback.

    Hugs and Blessings,

    1. Thanks for reading George. The tricky thing about "trusted friends" Is I'm new to blogging and Jordan and I keep our Dd life private so I don't really have "trusted friends". I do have some people who have been very friendly and welcoming:) I think once the story is done I will look for beta readers and go from there. I'm glad you enjoyed the story:) ♥ Lilly